Heading towards the last part of the year, how are you feeling?
Even with Covid around, for many people there is still Christmas to think about, to plan, to decide what presents (if any this year) can be purchased or should they rather be home-made? What will we eat for our Christmas dinner?
Here in George, many people have family and friends who come down here for the holiday season, to escape the rat race up in Gauteng.
Can you cope? How are you going to cope on top of everything else that has happened this year?
Take a few of your precious minutes to read this article I wrote some years ago. It is as relevant now as it was when I originally wrote it.
The Holidays – do these words make your heart sink just hearing them or seeing them? To many people they do – and to very many women! After all we women are the ones who organize everything, and sort out everything, and cook everything, and wrap everything, and play referee to the children’s squabbles, and drink too much to take away the stress, and panic when we hear that Aunty X is going to be coming along with her arch enemy Auntie Y, and feel devastated when we find out our ex is coming with his new younger model wife to give the children their gifts as you have to be pleasant to everyone during The Holidays right?
Phew… that is just the start of thoughts swirling around in our heads. How are we going to manage?
We do manage… most of the time – even if in the past we have resorted to a bit too much Christmas cheer or a secret stash of sherry or something stronger to see us through.
What about a new way of looking at things this holiday season? Tried reading the self help articles and all they did were take up more of your ever decreasing spare time? Already tried taking deep breaths and attempting to relax? Will power alone does not work. All the will in the world will not help if you are still focused on the same outcome.
OK… then what about a really new way of looking at all this holiday stress and strain? Enter Fairy Godmother waving her meridian tapping wand.
You need to relax my dear she says (tell me something I don’t already know…) – so what is this magic wand stuff and how is it going to help me?
First we do a set up – this is repeated three times:
Even though I am so totally stressed out and overwhelmed just thinking about the holidays never mind planning for them, I want to work through this right now
Even though in the past I got totally overwhelmed and nothing worked out as I wanted it to, this year it will be different and I am working towards that right now
Even though I don’t even know where to start there are so many thoughts whizzing around in my head, I am not going to go through the same stuff again this year so I want to work through this right now.
And now for some meridian tapping:
EB: I am totally overwhelmed
OE: I can’t go through this again
UE: I don’t even know where to start
UN: I can’t face all those awful relatives
CH: Why does my husband think I can just do this every year without help
CB: I deserve things to be different this year
UA: Maybe I can let some of this stress go
TOH: Perhaps it is safe for me to let some of this stress go right now
Take a deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep breath.
Feel any calmer? Good!
Now try these set ups:
Even though there is still a huge amount of work for me to do, I am working through this
Even though I still am not sure yet if I can cope, I am working through this
Even though there is a part of me that would rather not do this at all, I can take my power back and work through this right now.
Now the tapping:
EB: I can’t do this by myself
OE: Maybe I can ask the family to help
UE: Nobody ever helps me
UN: This time it can be different
CH: I deserve to have some help
CB: I deserve things to be different this year
UA: It is safe for me to ask for help
TOH: It is safe and easy for me to ask for help right now
Take another deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep breath. Any easier?
You might say how can this help me – I am the only one who does the planning and the cooking and and and… Well. Where does the responsibility lay? Do you live alone? If so then yes you decide what to do and plan and all the rest. However, most of us are doing all this because we have families and if we don’t ask them for help, I am fairly certain they are not all going to come rushing up begging to do the chores.
Have a family conference or pow-wow and tell them how it is going to be this year. Tell them you need help. Ask them how they would like to contribute in the way of help. Make a list… or continue to be a martyr and sneak out back with your vice of choice. But remember… you can make a change if you want to!